Feminism Fodder

My Rape advisory to men in India

Apparently the UK issued a rape advisory to its women for travelling to India. While I understand countries issue advisories to their own citizens travelling to other countries, it frustrated me because once again, it holds women responsible for being raped. But I thought, fair enough, the UK government can’t really do anything about India and the men who rape there. So I let it go.

And then I read this article. Which made my blood boil!!!!

Image source: Here

 

How ‘thoughtful’ of the author to consider that Indian women should follow the UK’s advisory to its own women. And not just that. The ever-so-thoughtful author, Anant Rangaswami, ends his article with this gem:

Overall, the advice is practical and sensible. Maybe all Indians should get some print-outs and hand them to women we know. After all, one woman (one Indian woman) is raped every 20 minutes in our country.

I think what Mr Rangaswami is forgetting a crucial point: 99.9% of the time, it is a man who is raping the 1 woman every 20 minutes.

So no, it’s not women in India who need a print-out of the UK government’s advisory to its women but rather, the men of India {who rape or harass women} who require one. And I am willing to give them one for free.

Sanch’s advisory to men (who rape women) in India: 

  1. When you see a woman on the road walking by herself, do not encroach on her personal space without her permission. An individual’s personal space can be defined as an arm’s length.
  2. When you see women in groups or on their own, do not approach them or wolf-whistle or call out lewd obscenities. While it might be difficult, you can actually control this by using the frontal lobe of your brain to send a message  to your mouth to not let the thoughts in your head be voiced out loud.

  3. When you see a woman in an attire that you find arousing, please keep your penis in your pants. Science shows that just because you are aroused, it does not mean you need to have sex. The penis is quite capable of going limp again without it affecting its functioning in future.

  4. When a woman says no, she doesn’t mean yes. In any language.

  5. If a woman chooses to go to an isolated area, it is not an invitation to rape her.

  6. If a woman is travelling alone on public transport or in a taxi or rickshaw, especially at night, do not have sex with her without her permission. Do not even touch her without her consent.

  7. If a woman is drunk after having partied at a night club, do not rape her. Even if she is passed on out the floor, you cannot have sex with her. Why? Because she is not in a position to consent.

  8. If a woman talks to you and smiles at you, it is not an invitation for sex. She was being friendly. Being friendly with someone is not the same as wanting to have sex with them.

So please, to quote Mr Rangaswami, “Maybe all Indian {women} should get some print-outs {of my advisory} and hand them to the {men} you know. After all, one Indian woman is raped every 20 mins in India” 

I’d just like to say one final word: I feel sorry for the men out there who don’t rape or harass and who respect women. I’m sure what Mr Rangaswami says {along with every one else holding women responsible for rape} is offensive to you too. Because basically, advisories like that which warn women to be responsible for their safety also imply that men cannot control themselves and are equivalent to animals in heat who have no other option but to act on it.

To my readers out there, would you like to add anything more to the advisory? 

Please share!

Until next time,

Cheers!!!

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No Comments

  • Reply
    Whoa, Molly!
    March 21, 2013 at 1:02 pm

    What a great post!

    I especially admired this line:

    “I feel sorry for the men out there who don’t rape or harass and who respect women. I’m sure what Mr Rangaswami says {along with every one else holding women responsible for rape} is offensive to you too. ”

    Now, if only you could get this into the hands of folk who are fuzzy on the notion of consent and the rights of women in public. Very practical advice!
    Whoa, Molly! recently posted…Pink Carriages & Face PalmsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Whoa, Molly!
    March 21, 2013 at 1:02 pm

    What a great post!

    I especially admired this line:

    “I feel sorry for the men out there who don’t rape or harass and who respect women. I’m sure what Mr Rangaswami says {along with every one else holding women responsible for rape} is offensive to you too. ”

    Now, if only you could get this into the hands of folk who are fuzzy on the notion of consent and the rights of women in public. Very practical advice!
    Whoa, Molly! recently posted…Pink Carriages & Face PalmsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Smitha
    March 21, 2013 at 5:03 pm

    Goodness! He basically says that we women get raped because we don’t follow this, ‘practical and sensible’! Yeah right! He seriously takes victim blaming to a different level!

    I so wish the author reads your advisory – that is really what we need!
    Smitha recently posted…Just to make a milestone..My Profile

  • Reply
    Smitha
    March 21, 2013 at 5:03 pm

    Goodness! He basically says that we women get raped because we don’t follow this, ‘practical and sensible’! Yeah right! He seriously takes victim blaming to a different level!

    I so wish the author reads your advisory – that is really what we need!
    Smitha recently posted…Just to make a milestone..My Profile

  • Reply
    Lazy Pineapple
    March 22, 2013 at 3:53 am

    When are men going to take the responsibility? Mr. Rangaswamy is a typical Indian male who believes that the blame lies with the women and that men have no part to play in the rape. It is us women who need advice how not to get raped.
    Lazy Pineapple recently posted…Caption Contest 18 “You think you are funny?My Profile

  • Reply
    Lazy Pineapple
    March 22, 2013 at 3:53 am

    When are men going to take the responsibility? Mr. Rangaswamy is a typical Indian male who believes that the blame lies with the women and that men have no part to play in the rape. It is us women who need advice how not to get raped.
    Lazy Pineapple recently posted…Caption Contest 18 “You think you are funny?My Profile

  • Reply
    Dagny
    March 22, 2013 at 4:01 am

    Your last paragraph was THE thing. I liked you advisory #3 particularly.

    Dagny

  • Reply
    Dagny
    March 22, 2013 at 4:01 am

    Your last paragraph was THE thing. I liked you advisory #3 particularly.

    Dagny

  • Reply
    Akanksha Dureja
    March 22, 2013 at 4:03 am

    Very well said. Men can’t keep it in their pants and go around blaming women for arousing them. I fail to understand when this victim blaming would stop. India is a pothole when it comes to women and even though you and me are writing it out, fighting in our own way, we have a long way to go in this freedom struggle which we have initiated.

  • Reply
    Akanksha Dureja
    March 22, 2013 at 4:03 am

    Very well said. Men can’t keep it in their pants and go around blaming women for arousing them. I fail to understand when this victim blaming would stop. India is a pothole when it comes to women and even though you and me are writing it out, fighting in our own way, we have a long way to go in this freedom struggle which we have initiated.

  • Reply
    C. Suresh
    March 22, 2013 at 4:08 am

    Hmmm! Wonderful tongue-in-cheek advisory 🙂 And, thanks for understanding that Mr. Rangaswami was actually being offensive to decent men as well.
    C. Suresh recently posted…A typical(?) Group DiscussionMy Profile

  • Reply
    C. Suresh
    March 22, 2013 at 4:08 am

    Hmmm! Wonderful tongue-in-cheek advisory 🙂 And, thanks for understanding that Mr. Rangaswami was actually being offensive to decent men as well.
    C. Suresh recently posted…A typical(?) Group DiscussionMy Profile

  • Reply
    Bhagwad Jal Park
    March 22, 2013 at 6:02 am

    Sometimes it seems people think Indian men are like some natural force of nature like gravity or the wind. Saying “Wear this otherwise you’ll get raped” is like saying “Don’t step off a cliff or you will fall”. As if men themselves have no willful agency or a choice the matter. As if they’re some animals – “Don’t go into that house – there’s a dog there who bites!”

    It’s absurd. Men choose to rape. Rape doesn’t “happen to women”. It’s not a passive verb, but at active one.

    Dumb.
    Bhagwad Jal Park recently posted…Newspaper Headlines Feed Our Prejudices on Rape and RaceMy Profile

  • Reply
    Bhagwad Jal Park
    March 22, 2013 at 6:02 am

    Sometimes it seems people think Indian men are like some natural force of nature like gravity or the wind. Saying “Wear this otherwise you’ll get raped” is like saying “Don’t step off a cliff or you will fall”. As if men themselves have no willful agency or a choice the matter. As if they’re some animals – “Don’t go into that house – there’s a dog there who bites!”

    It’s absurd. Men choose to rape. Rape doesn’t “happen to women”. It’s not a passive verb, but at active one.

    Dumb.
    Bhagwad Jal Park recently posted…Newspaper Headlines Feed Our Prejudices on Rape and RaceMy Profile

  • Reply
    Rachna
    March 22, 2013 at 7:40 pm

    Absolutely! These statements are an insult to all decent human beings including loads of men. I don’t blame other countries advising their female citizens to stay away when I don’t feel safe on the streets of my own country.
    Rachna recently posted…Teenage Children and Parental ControlMy Profile

  • Reply
    Rachna
    March 22, 2013 at 7:40 pm

    Absolutely! These statements are an insult to all decent human beings including loads of men. I don’t blame other countries advising their female citizens to stay away when I don’t feel safe on the streets of my own country.
    Rachna recently posted…Teenage Children and Parental ControlMy Profile

  • Reply
    Amrita
    March 25, 2013 at 11:25 pm

    I couldn’t agree more!
    Amrita recently posted…It’s a good day to try hard…My Profile

  • Reply
    Amrita
    March 25, 2013 at 11:25 pm

    I couldn’t agree more!
    Amrita recently posted…It’s a good day to try hard…My Profile

  • Reply
    Avada Kedavra
    March 26, 2013 at 5:46 am

    Read this post long back but did not comment. Every man in India must read this post! Seriously!
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  • Reply
    Avada Kedavra
    March 26, 2013 at 5:46 am

    Read this post long back but did not comment. Every man in India must read this post! Seriously!
    Avada Kedavra recently posted…CA-1 pacific coast tripMy Profile

  • Reply
    Srinidhi
    March 28, 2013 at 3:28 am

    Trust me, it is simply exhausting to read the rubbish that people keep saying. Thank god for women like you who put it simply and smartly. Thank you.

    I agree with every word 🙂

  • Reply
    Srinidhi
    March 28, 2013 at 3:28 am

    Trust me, it is simply exhausting to read the rubbish that people keep saying. Thank god for women like you who put it simply and smartly. Thank you.

    I agree with every word 🙂

  • Reply
    Crunch
    April 4, 2013 at 4:52 am

    Here I’ll add a few more …
    9. http://www.antirape.co.za
    You have been warned!
    10. Don’t make ‘rape’ jokes please! These jokes are alive and kicking in schools sowing these horrible seeds of thought at a young age. Such jokes have a way of percolating down from adults fairly quickly .. so stop with the jokes already. They’re not funny. And when in doubt, refer 9.

  • Reply
    Crunch
    April 4, 2013 at 4:52 am

    Here I’ll add a few more …
    9. http://www.antirape.co.za
    You have been warned!
    10. Don’t make ‘rape’ jokes please! These jokes are alive and kicking in schools sowing these horrible seeds of thought at a young age. Such jokes have a way of percolating down from adults fairly quickly .. so stop with the jokes already. They’re not funny. And when in doubt, refer 9.

  • Reply
    An Open Letter to Julie Bishop - Living my Imperfect Life
    October 30, 2014 at 1:04 pm

    […] about what they were wearing or how much they were drinking or how they were out late at night. The men who assault get asked nothing. Feminism is still fighting hard to end that judgement. I’m sure you hear […]

  • Reply
    An Open Letter to Julie Bishop - Living my Imperfect Life
    October 30, 2014 at 1:04 pm

    […] about what they were wearing or how much they were drinking or how they were out late at night. The men who assault get asked nothing. Feminism is still fighting hard to end that judgement. I’m sure you hear […]

  • Reply
    Lata
    February 9, 2015 at 9:45 pm

    This is a wonderful post.. sadly it will remain evergreen.. as there is no change in the men’s attitude even after 2 years of you have written this.

  • Reply
    Lata
    February 9, 2015 at 9:45 pm

    This is a wonderful post.. sadly it will remain evergreen.. as there is no change in the men’s attitude even after 2 years of you have written this.

  • Reply
    Vinitha
    February 10, 2015 at 12:57 am

    That was the perfect advisory to the men in India. If only the so called men read and followed them. Here we are 2 years later, situation hasn’t changed the slightest, not the rapes, not the blame games!
    Vinitha recently posted…#MicroblogMondays – Valentine’s DayMy Profile

  • Reply
    Vinitha
    February 10, 2015 at 12:57 am

    That was the perfect advisory to the men in India. If only the so called men read and followed them. Here we are 2 years later, situation hasn’t changed the slightest, not the rapes, not the blame games!
    Vinitha recently posted…#MicroblogMondays – Valentine’s DayMy Profile

  • Reply
    Sulekha
    February 10, 2015 at 6:25 am

    Well said, Sanch. Assaults on women have to stop, enough is enough.

  • Reply
    Sulekha
    February 10, 2015 at 6:25 am

    Well said, Sanch. Assaults on women have to stop, enough is enough.

  • Reply
    elly stornebrink
    February 10, 2015 at 7:29 pm

    A well-written post – you have every bloody right to be angry just like that kid’s face! – on such an important and sensitive issue. Enough brutality: STOP! It’s ludicrous that women are still made to feel it is their fault and they are to blame. Let women be empowered to feel safe, the #8 by Crunch above s interesting though I wasn’t quite sure what it was/how it works… 😉 <3 (My version is on Dec. 10th below and then scroll down to Dec. 6 for part 1 of it: http://xpressyouressence.blogspot.ca/2014/12/december-10-human-rights-day.html <3
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  • Reply
    elly stornebrink
    February 10, 2015 at 7:29 pm

    A well-written post – you have every bloody right to be angry just like that kid’s face! – on such an important and sensitive issue. Enough brutality: STOP! It’s ludicrous that women are still made to feel it is their fault and they are to blame. Let women be empowered to feel safe, the #8 by Crunch above s interesting though I wasn’t quite sure what it was/how it works… 😉 <3 (My version is on Dec. 10th below and then scroll down to Dec. 6 for part 1 of it: http://xpressyouressence.blogspot.ca/2014/12/december-10-human-rights-day.html <3
    elly stornebrink recently posted…NaBloPoMo: Maker FaireMy Profile

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