Life lessons

On being spontaneous

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Image Source: Here

I have been a planner most of my life. You know the type: the one who makes lists, lives by diaries, ticks things off once they are complete and gets a high out of it. Well, I was such a rigid planner at times that I needed to have a plan for the weekend a week in advance and just couldn’t do anything spontaneous. It would turn me into a nervous wreck. My ex used to get frustrated by that initially as I would baulk at a suggestion of a movie when we hadn’t ‘planned’ on going to one!

Anyway, I have become a lot better in the last couple of years or so. {I guess the ex should take some credit for that!}

I let go off planning my weekends.

I became a bit more open to spontaneity.

And learnt that the world doesn’t necessarily end when you do something you haven’t planned.

It’s been an interesting experience for someone who likes routine and lives within the confines of a planner. I still have to plan a reasonable amount given that I am doing a lot. But I’ve also become a lot more flexible. Take, for instance, the long weekend we are currently having. Until last Sunday, my ‘plan’ for the long weekend was to chill out at home with the cats, read and maybe clean the house and get into blogging. Oh, and catch up on a whole lot of sleep! But then, on Tuesday, the Bushwalking group put up a walk for Good Friday, on Wednesday, the English Guy asked if I wanted to do a day trip sometime this long weekend down to the south coast and on Thursday, one of the other guys I was talking to during our bushwalk asked if I wanted to catch up for coffee {I’m still unsure if it’s a date or just a friendly catch-up…I’m really dense when it comes to these things!!}. 2 years ago, I would have not gone ahead with any of these. But this time around, I did it. I agreed to do all three. All very spontaneous things. Especially the south coast trip.

The end result was that the past two days were incredible. The bushwalk on Friday was a harder walk but oh-so-exhilarating. We were all being a bit spontaneous I suppose as the two usual group leaders were away. We did get a bit lost initially but it just added to the sense of fun and adventure. And by being spontaneous and doing this, I met a couple of lovely ladies and got to know some others I’d met the week before a bit better.

And as for the trip down the coast yesterday, well, there was a part of me that thought I was being a bit mental doing a day trip with a guy I’d known for a week {Don’t freak out, mum!} but at the same time, English Guy didn’t give me a creepy vibe. Just a wow-things-might-be-moving-fast one. In any case, my friends knew that I was going and everything. And you know what? The spontaneity paid off. It was a lovely drive down the coast. I finally got to see Hyams Beach {yay} but it was a bit crowded being the long weekend and all. Spent all afternoon on one of the smaller beaches that was a lot less crowded. And mind you, none of this was planned. English Guy had been down the coast before but we just went and explored places he’d never been to either. So yeah, just went with the flow. And I didn’t freak out one bit. The South Coast is so beautiful. There’s still so much more to see I know but I feel like now that I’ve been there once, I can choose to be spontaneous on my own and drive down there. Especially as it’s only a couple of hours from where I live. One minor downside of that spontaneity is that after spending a whole day together yesterday, I’m liking English Guy more. Even though the rational part of my brain keeps telling me there probably is no future.

I think though I’m finally close to finding a balance though between being a planner and being spontaneous.

I still have to plan my work days and plan things such as what walks to go on and the like. But in other areas, I have realised I can just be crazy and spontaneous and take a trip some place. {Well, a day trip…because overnight ones would require a little planning around the cats needing to be minded!} And I’m liking that.

Life is so much more exhilarating when you can be that little bit spontaneous and take a risk. I guess it completely ties in with being a bit out of your comfort zone. 🙂

What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done??

Until next time,

Cheers!!!

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  • Reply
    Desi Girl
    March 31, 2013 at 11:29 am

    Hi!

    I am so glad you are making a positive change. All my life I was a spontaneous person once my work day was done but after a brain injury now I am being taught how to follow a routine by the white board so I can appreciate what you are saying- change is hard and it is scary.
    About the English guy, just enjoy your time with him nothing is permanent just tell your self and you’ll be fine.
    More power to you.
    Peace,

    Desi Girl

  • Reply
    Desi Girl
    March 31, 2013 at 11:29 am

    Hi!

    I am so glad you are making a positive change. All my life I was a spontaneous person once my work day was done but after a brain injury now I am being taught how to follow a routine by the white board so I can appreciate what you are saying- change is hard and it is scary.
    About the English guy, just enjoy your time with him nothing is permanent just tell your self and you’ll be fine.
    More power to you.
    Peace,

    Desi Girl

  • Reply
    NS
    March 31, 2013 at 1:59 pm

    Sometimes, sponteanity pays. I used to be like this before – I would baulk at a suggestion of a movie when we hadn’t ‘planned’ on going to one!

    I guess being planned is necessary to some extent, otherwise things would never get done. But its good to let go at times..
    NS recently posted…Berryessa Flea Market, San JoseMy Profile

  • Reply
    NS
    March 31, 2013 at 1:59 pm

    Sometimes, sponteanity pays. I used to be like this before – I would baulk at a suggestion of a movie when we hadn’t ‘planned’ on going to one!

    I guess being planned is necessary to some extent, otherwise things would never get done. But its good to let go at times..
    NS recently posted…Berryessa Flea Market, San JoseMy Profile

  • Reply
    Tuhina Mahan
    March 31, 2013 at 10:13 pm

    Oh dear! You still need a few lesson on spontaneity. Agreed these were short notice plans but nevertheless they were planned trips. You didn’t wake up and got a call that someone is coming to pick you up for a long drive in half hour! Well, that’s being spontaneous. Being spontaneous is getting into car with no idea where you are going. Simply start driving and see where the road takes you while taking all the vista point stops on the way to see what can you see from those vantage points. That’s exploring the neighborhood for me. And trust me I have ended up in some nasty places you would never plan to go. But that’s the part of adventure.

    In my regular life, I am quite organized and once I have made a plan, I have this terrible compulsion to stick to it. I get stressed if things don’t work out as per my schedule but I do have these spontaneous adventures quite often as well. Keeps things in perspective.
    Tuhina Mahan recently posted…Tag: Eye CandyMy Profile

  • Reply
    Tuhina Mahan
    March 31, 2013 at 10:13 pm

    Oh dear! You still need a few lesson on spontaneity. Agreed these were short notice plans but nevertheless they were planned trips. You didn’t wake up and got a call that someone is coming to pick you up for a long drive in half hour! Well, that’s being spontaneous. Being spontaneous is getting into car with no idea where you are going. Simply start driving and see where the road takes you while taking all the vista point stops on the way to see what can you see from those vantage points. That’s exploring the neighborhood for me. And trust me I have ended up in some nasty places you would never plan to go. But that’s the part of adventure.

    In my regular life, I am quite organized and once I have made a plan, I have this terrible compulsion to stick to it. I get stressed if things don’t work out as per my schedule but I do have these spontaneous adventures quite often as well. Keeps things in perspective.
    Tuhina Mahan recently posted…Tag: Eye CandyMy Profile

  • Reply
    R's Mom
    April 1, 2013 at 2:35 pm

    Happy to hear that spontaneity worked well for you…continue being spontaneous eh?
    R’s Mom recently posted…Of Seed Money, Slates and CakesMy Profile

  • Reply
    R's Mom
    April 1, 2013 at 2:35 pm

    Happy to hear that spontaneity worked well for you…continue being spontaneous eh?
    R’s Mom recently posted…Of Seed Money, Slates and CakesMy Profile

  • Reply
    Titaxy
    April 2, 2013 at 2:07 am

    What fun! I love spontaneous trips so much. Long weekend at my end was spent in a spontaneous trip too. Took Friday off (because I didn’t have a long weekend, you see) and drove down the coast. Everything fell in place and the trip was so memorable. Can’t wait for summer to come and more weekend trips to happen.

  • Reply
    Titaxy
    April 2, 2013 at 2:07 am

    What fun! I love spontaneous trips so much. Long weekend at my end was spent in a spontaneous trip too. Took Friday off (because I didn’t have a long weekend, you see) and drove down the coast. Everything fell in place and the trip was so memorable. Can’t wait for summer to come and more weekend trips to happen.

  • Reply
    GR
    April 2, 2013 at 9:24 am

    Nice post PB ! Just like you, I also like planning my schedule before hand to avoid anxiety. But adding spontaneity also adds spice. 🙂 The most spontaneous thing I have done till date would be my and my hubby’s last minute decision to move between places for work reasons in 1 day. That’s right. 🙂

    But the experience was real fun. Due to some circumstances we ended in this never-before situation. The whole night was spent packing and before we knew it, we had all our stuff ready for the movers to pick up the next morning. 🙂 Not sure we can be that fast every time though….
    GR recently posted…It’s still not late…My Profile

  • Reply
    GR
    April 2, 2013 at 9:24 am

    Nice post PB ! Just like you, I also like planning my schedule before hand to avoid anxiety. But adding spontaneity also adds spice. 🙂 The most spontaneous thing I have done till date would be my and my hubby’s last minute decision to move between places for work reasons in 1 day. That’s right. 🙂

    But the experience was real fun. Due to some circumstances we ended in this never-before situation. The whole night was spent packing and before we knew it, we had all our stuff ready for the movers to pick up the next morning. 🙂 Not sure we can be that fast every time though….
    GR recently posted…It’s still not late…My Profile

  • Reply
    Avada Kedavra
    April 3, 2013 at 11:00 am

    I am still like you! I cannot do something without planning it well in advance. If I am planning to meet a friend on saturday, I ping her on monday. She might think I am crazy but I would like to know in advance so that I can plan other things 🙂 I need to change! Good to know you had fun planning things spontaneously
    Avada Kedavra recently posted…Experience is the best teacherMy Profile

  • Reply
    Avada Kedavra
    April 3, 2013 at 11:00 am

    I am still like you! I cannot do something without planning it well in advance. If I am planning to meet a friend on saturday, I ping her on monday. She might think I am crazy but I would like to know in advance so that I can plan other things 🙂 I need to change! Good to know you had fun planning things spontaneously
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  • Reply
    Little Fingers
    May 18, 2013 at 5:19 pm

    Most of our day trips are spontaneous, I remember once we landed Cape town via flight past midnight and instead of staying in a hotel we just drove whole night and reached Kynsna next day morning. That was one crazy drive but looking back it was oe fun trip too. The way I kissed my husband was like that too 🙂
    Little Fingers recently posted…RainMy Profile

  • Reply
    Little Fingers
    May 18, 2013 at 5:19 pm

    Most of our day trips are spontaneous, I remember once we landed Cape town via flight past midnight and instead of staying in a hotel we just drove whole night and reached Kynsna next day morning. That was one crazy drive but looking back it was oe fun trip too. The way I kissed my husband was like that too 🙂
    Little Fingers recently posted…RainMy Profile

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