Feminism Fodder

Feminism Friday: India’s Daughter edition

Feminism Friday

 

I have been a bad feminism promoter this week. Okay, so maybe not bad as I still behave according to my values. But I didn’t get much of a chance to read this week. Blame it on the A to Z Challenge, the long weekend and more importantly, an essay being due on Wednesday. I blinked and it was Feminism Friday!

I did however, watch India’s Daughter that was telecast on Four Corners on Monday night. To say it evoked anger and sadness is an understatement. My tears for Jyoti and her parents didn’t stop flowing. I was angry at the rapists but I was even more livid at the defense lawyers and their views. These are supposedly educated men who think burning a woman for staying out late at night is perfectly fine. I requested Mr Imperfect to watch it with me — sometimes I think he wonders why I am a feminist. I think the documentary showed him why. It showed him the culture I grew up in. It showed him why I have had to fight. It showed him why I have a problem with patriarchy.

In the end though, all I felt was an emptiness.

While it is heartening to see change occurring in India in the form of protests by the masses, I fear that I won’t live long enough to see us overthrow the patriarchal culture that pervades almost all societies in the world.

Close to home, yet another woman has been killed. While it wasn’t at the hands of her partner, I am willing to place my bets that the alleged murderer was infatuated by her and was angry that she was getting married to someone else. Or maybe, I have just been reading and watching too many crime books and shows. This crime occurred around noon — in broad daylight. Which goes to show once again, it’s not what we wear or how late we stay out or if we go to parks by ourselves or drink or are not religious, but rather, it’s the perpetrators who are to blame and think they can get away with it. My heart breaks for Stephanie’s family and her fiance. Just as it does for Jyoti’s family. And the families of all the women who have been killed because some men think it’s okay to do so.

I am sick of this world.

Did you watch India’s Daughter? {If you didn’t, do watch it on iView)

Do share your thoughts!

***Linking with Grace for FYBF***

Until next time,

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  • Radhika@FulltimeNomad
    April 10, 2015 at 11:32 am

    Hey Sanch. I was going to watch it on Monday and then I just couldn’t do it 🙁

    You probably know without me even saying it that I can completely relate to your post and the sadness & the anger that I felt without even watching the documentary made me stay away. Maybe I will stop being such a wuss and watch it eventually but it’s just the hopelessness of it and the helplessness I feel makes it so overwhelming for me right now.

    I also had pretty much the same reaction as you re: the Stephanie Scott story and I’m just so tired today. Tired of this constant fight women have, in India, in Australia and almost everywhere in the world.
    Radhika@FulltimeNomad recently posted…Football in Medellín: My Colombian Soccer ExperienceMy Profile

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 10, 2015 at 9:42 pm

      I know a few people who found it hard to watch. I think I’m just numb to such horror nowadays. The fight is exhausting for us world over I think. I used to be hopeful that things were better here…I’m slowly learning it’s not. It’s just more subtle.

  • Radhika@FulltimeNomad
    April 10, 2015 at 11:32 am

    Hey Sanch. I was going to watch it on Monday and then I just couldn’t do it 🙁

    You probably know without me even saying it that I can completely relate to your post and the sadness & the anger that I felt without even watching the documentary made me stay away. Maybe I will stop being such a wuss and watch it eventually but it’s just the hopelessness of it and the helplessness I feel makes it so overwhelming for me right now.

    I also had pretty much the same reaction as you re: the Stephanie Scott story and I’m just so tired today. Tired of this constant fight women have, in India, in Australia and almost everywhere in the world.
    Radhika@FulltimeNomad recently posted…Football in Medellín: My Colombian Soccer ExperienceMy Profile

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 10, 2015 at 9:42 pm

      I know a few people who found it hard to watch. I think I’m just numb to such horror nowadays. The fight is exhausting for us world over I think. I used to be hopeful that things were better here…I’m slowly learning it’s not. It’s just more subtle.

  • Amy @ HandbagMafia
    April 10, 2015 at 11:45 am

    As usual I agree with you- especially that this last horror story will show up some infatuation, possibly she rejected him or something- this is the classic scenario isn’t it?
    Amy @ HandbagMafia recently posted…Tantrums: Theirs and MineMy Profile

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 10, 2015 at 11:53 pm

      Oh I’m almost certain that’s the reason for her death Amy. So sad and so very entitled of the man, of course!

  • Amy @ HandbagMafia
    April 10, 2015 at 11:45 am

    As usual I agree with you- especially that this last horror story will show up some infatuation, possibly she rejected him or something- this is the classic scenario isn’t it?
    Amy @ HandbagMafia recently posted…Tantrums: Theirs and MineMy Profile

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 10, 2015 at 11:53 pm

      Oh I’m almost certain that’s the reason for her death Amy. So sad and so very entitled of the man, of course!

  • Deborah
    April 10, 2015 at 12:42 pm

    Oh, thanks for the heads up. I’ll check it out!
    Deborah recently posted…Book review: Missing You by Kylie KadenMy Profile

  • Deborah
    April 10, 2015 at 12:42 pm

    Oh, thanks for the heads up. I’ll check it out!
    Deborah recently posted…Book review: Missing You by Kylie KadenMy Profile

  • Lillian Csernica
    April 10, 2015 at 2:43 pm

    I share your fear that I will not live to see the day when women are no longer treated as merely disposable, used, abused, and thrown away. I am inspired by your “Feminism Friday.” I will give thought to choosing a day and a particular aspect of this situation to address. While we have voices, we must use them.

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 11, 2015 at 8:53 am

      Thanks Lillian. If you would like to write a guest post on the topic, please feel free to email me. I would love guest posts to promote gender equality and women’s rights. And you’re right — while we have voices, we must use them!

  • Lillian Csernica
    April 10, 2015 at 2:43 pm

    I share your fear that I will not live to see the day when women are no longer treated as merely disposable, used, abused, and thrown away. I am inspired by your “Feminism Friday.” I will give thought to choosing a day and a particular aspect of this situation to address. While we have voices, we must use them.

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 11, 2015 at 8:53 am

      Thanks Lillian. If you would like to write a guest post on the topic, please feel free to email me. I would love guest posts to promote gender equality and women’s rights. And you’re right — while we have voices, we must use them!

  • elly stornebrink
    April 10, 2015 at 4:21 pm

    I am glad you are a feminist Sanch and think it’s great you got ‘Mr. Imperfect’ to watch it with you so he can (better) understand. It certainly is high time for things to change and I can understand why you would be defeated. However, do not ever give up hope…for that is all we need to make things change…. 😉 <3
    elly stornebrink recently posted…#A to Z Challenge: I is for Inspiration!My Profile

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 11, 2015 at 10:59 am

      Yeah I know Elly…I really shouldn’t give up hope but sometimes, it’s just too tiring! I know I’ll keep fighting though

  • elly stornebrink
    April 10, 2015 at 4:21 pm

    I am glad you are a feminist Sanch and think it’s great you got ‘Mr. Imperfect’ to watch it with you so he can (better) understand. It certainly is high time for things to change and I can understand why you would be defeated. However, do not ever give up hope…for that is all we need to make things change…. 😉 <3
    elly stornebrink recently posted…#A to Z Challenge: I is for Inspiration!My Profile

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 11, 2015 at 10:59 am

      Yeah I know Elly…I really shouldn’t give up hope but sometimes, it’s just too tiring! I know I’ll keep fighting though

  • Kerry
    April 10, 2015 at 4:28 pm

    It aired here in Canada, on our national CBC network a month or so ago, on International Women’s Day. There was the whole thing about how it was banned in India. I am visually impaired. I watched it alone and missed a lot because I couldn’t read the subtitles, but in a strange way I don’t feel I missed much at all.
    I did end up watching it again, with my sister later, and she read them to me.
    The funny part is just in how I didn’t need to hear all the words spoken to know. I could feel through the tones of the voices speaking, whether it was the ignorance of the attorney or the grief from the parents. I felt sickened, hopeless, disgusted all without having to know every single word spoken.
    I am working on a post about my feelings on watching, on the banning, and on violence against women, not only in India, but Canada and the US as well.
    I am just having trouble putting it all into the right words to form the thoughts I want to get across. It all makes me so mad and I am frustrated that progress of this sort takes so long.
    Glad to see this feminist Friday post.
    Kerry recently posted…The Dark MarkMy Profile

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 11, 2015 at 11:01 am

      I know what you mean Kerry — I don’t think you have to actually watch or even understand the words sometimes. True, the words make it more appalling but the tone and dismissive nature of the perpetrators and the lawyers comes across very easily.

      And yes, violence against women exists everywhere, sadly. I think in the end, we are all living in patriarchal societies and until that changes, nothing will.

  • Kerry
    April 10, 2015 at 4:28 pm

    It aired here in Canada, on our national CBC network a month or so ago, on International Women’s Day. There was the whole thing about how it was banned in India. I am visually impaired. I watched it alone and missed a lot because I couldn’t read the subtitles, but in a strange way I don’t feel I missed much at all.
    I did end up watching it again, with my sister later, and she read them to me.
    The funny part is just in how I didn’t need to hear all the words spoken to know. I could feel through the tones of the voices speaking, whether it was the ignorance of the attorney or the grief from the parents. I felt sickened, hopeless, disgusted all without having to know every single word spoken.
    I am working on a post about my feelings on watching, on the banning, and on violence against women, not only in India, but Canada and the US as well.
    I am just having trouble putting it all into the right words to form the thoughts I want to get across. It all makes me so mad and I am frustrated that progress of this sort takes so long.
    Glad to see this feminist Friday post.
    Kerry recently posted…The Dark MarkMy Profile

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 11, 2015 at 11:01 am

      I know what you mean Kerry — I don’t think you have to actually watch or even understand the words sometimes. True, the words make it more appalling but the tone and dismissive nature of the perpetrators and the lawyers comes across very easily.

      And yes, violence against women exists everywhere, sadly. I think in the end, we are all living in patriarchal societies and until that changes, nothing will.

  • Venice
    April 10, 2015 at 8:02 pm

    Hi Sanch. I watched India’s Daughter on YouTube the day before it was banned. Somehow I felt that, in a way, the backgrounds of the perpetrators – their upbringing, their lifestyle – all of it was responsible. I’m in no way defending them, but listen to them – they felt that it was ‘normal’ to ‘teach’ a girl not to roam around late at night with a male.

    The mentality is what needs to be changed – world over.
    Venice recently posted…E is for Eric Clapton (A to Z Challenge 2015)My Profile

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 11, 2015 at 11:09 am

      I agree Venice that the perpetrators’ backgrounds had a lot to do with it — but they get their backgrounds and learn from how men can get away with everything in India. And that’s the scary thing. The scary thing was how ‘normal’ they seemed to think it was — the perps and the lawyers. And that’s just not on!

  • Venice
    April 10, 2015 at 8:02 pm

    Hi Sanch. I watched India’s Daughter on YouTube the day before it was banned. Somehow I felt that, in a way, the backgrounds of the perpetrators – their upbringing, their lifestyle – all of it was responsible. I’m in no way defending them, but listen to them – they felt that it was ‘normal’ to ‘teach’ a girl not to roam around late at night with a male.

    The mentality is what needs to be changed – world over.
    Venice recently posted…E is for Eric Clapton (A to Z Challenge 2015)My Profile

    • Sanch @ Living my Imperfect Life
      April 11, 2015 at 11:09 am

      I agree Venice that the perpetrators’ backgrounds had a lot to do with it — but they get their backgrounds and learn from how men can get away with everything in India. And that’s the scary thing. The scary thing was how ‘normal’ they seemed to think it was — the perps and the lawyers. And that’s just not on!

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